Unwritten Rules of Relationships - Latest Comments

Re: Can You Handle Dating a Mama’s Boy?

Webspace — Sun, 18 Mar 2012 07:27:07 -0000

i little lie can help you to get fast to your goal

Re: Can You Handle Dating a Mama’s Boy?

Cutiepie — Mon, 16 Jan 2012 09:10:30 -0000

I just split up with my mothers boy last night.......im heartbroken we have split but i could not continue playing second fiddle any longer! He is 46 and lives 2 mins from his mother, also stays there sometimes. I called him 10 days ago at 6 pm to tell him i was threatening a miscarriage, he was at his mothers house and because she had had a fall that day he decided he was going to stay with her as she couldnt be left on her own!...His sister lives 5 minutes away, she could have went to sit with mother. anyway i called him at midnight crying as i had lost the baby, he was now back in his own flat, because he didnt want his mother disturbed during the night if i called him!!!!! I was obviously very upset and when he did eventually come over after i had asked him to, i told him i felt let down and abandoned and he just said i obviously was very insecure!!!!! To make matters worse i actually began to believe him (i am 40 and should know better!) Lots of silly things have been happening and i have just been pretending everything is ok, but yesterday i could no longer pretend. I hadnt seen him for 6 days cos he was busy with his mother and doing other stuff, we had arranged to meet on Thursday for an hour when i finished work for a coffee but he cancelled cos he had been out all day shopping with his mother. So on Sat when he turned up at my house i was really happy to see him because i do love him, Sat night was great and he stayed over. He is going for a disciplinary in work on Tues so we were discussing this yesterday morning , and it looks like he is going to lose his job which in turn will mean losing his car etc, anyway he asked if he does lose his job can he get put on my insurance to drive my car as he will need it to get his mum about!!!!!!!! i just started laughing because i couldnt quite believe it, then we went for a small walk and got back to mines about 2 in the afternoon, he had a coffee then said he was going to see his mother and also could he take the breadsticks and dips that had been unopened the night before as his mother loves them!!...... At this point i was sooo angry i left the room, he didnt actually take anything but i walked him to the door and said goodbye, i felt very sad as i knew that it was now over and that i couldnt take anymore. I took the cowards way out and sent him a text last night telling him it was over, this is not an option i took lightly but the last time i tried to end it due to this behaviour he turned it all on me, this time i wasnt giving him a chance to do that. From day one he told me he loved his mother unconditionally and that she was the most important person in his life, i had actually thought it was very sweet and found it an attractive quality!!!....

Re: Can You Handle Dating a Mama’s Boy?

Guest — Mon, 16 Jan 2012 09:09:28 -0000

Re: Can You Handle Dating a Mama’s Boy?

Donnasim21@hotmail.com — Mon, 16 Jan 2012 09:08:37 -0000

Re: Angry Black Women Syndrome(ABWS)

Butler-robert — Thu, 12 Jan 2012 00:40:22 -0000

Since Slavery, this society/culture has had a fundemental desrespect of black men. Until
an advanced age, adult black men are referred to as boys. We are denied all oppertunities
to advance in this system. Even if we achieve great status - such as President Obama - we
are still denied respect do to the Office of President! Since birth, a Black boy is virwed as
less intellegent, less capable and more apt to be irresposible and eventually a criminal.
We are really precieved as being sub-human. Being denied a father and growing up in
a hostile enviornment many boys grow up confused have to speculate as to who they are
and how do they fit in this rascist system? Viewed as being inferior, many boys just give
up and accept the lower caste role of acceptable expectation! With the dissolution of
the family and the emerging role of Women, many White boys are soon to join their
Black Brothers!

Re: Can You Handle Dating a Mama’s Boy?

Tinabanbina — Tue, 27 Dec 2011 00:42:09 -0000

please everyone read this book:
--When He's Married to Mom: How to Help Mother-Enmeshed Men Open Their Hearts to True Love and Commitment

by Kenneth Adams & Alexander P. Morgan

I came upon it when i googled in desperation about this very situation of "dating a momma's boy" because it's the saddest shit ever. This book helped me find my fucking sainty again. I will end it asap.

Re: Can You Handle Dating a Mama’s Boy?

Honey_buns11 — Sun, 13 Nov 2011 00:53:56 -0000

OMG, i am engaged and we are both pretty young both almost 20 and his mother is a little to much. She will talk about how much he needs her and how he cannot live without her and how hes stuck on her tit forever. Well, he keeps talking about us getting our own place, but hasnt hasnt. so i finally got sick of his mothers mouth and said something to him. i threatned to leave him because i cant deal with his mothers comments. she will talk about how cute his butt is, and how he is just one good lookin man and if he wasnt her son shes be all over that. i find that weird. so he said something to his mother and now she is moving to a different state with her "crazy" boyfriend. did i mention his mom lies ALL the time. Anyways, his mom has been gone for 2 days and now he said he is all depressed cause he misses his mom. Seriously come on, it makes me sick. o love him with all my heart but i dont want to deal with this mammas boy stuff. dont know what to do......

Re: Can You Handle Dating a Mama’s Boy?

Brendaghenry40 — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 15:23:23 -0000

Look up covert incest, this is what I have been dealing with, a perfect text book definition. The good news is I have no intention of ever becoming serious with this man. His parents are both married in their mid 80s and he is in his 60s. He calls her constantly, they all vacation together 3 to 4 times per year. He was married for an entire 3 months and she left saying he was in love with his mom. She hates me because I don't worship the ground she walks on. I find the entire situation now, crazy. I'm as mean as possible to him, I ignore her, he tries to tell me what to do like his mom, I tell them both to eat shit, sick, yes. Its a real challenge and as I said, I don't care because I have no intention of ever, ever marrying them.

Re: Can You Handle Dating a Mama’s Boy?

Fashionzone — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 09:41:15 -0000

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Re: There is Nothing Fair About Sex!

Bluebrocade — Wed, 14 Sep 2011 14:40:58 -0000

Funny that you make that you stated that only for the ladies. It's also true in the reverse. No woman wants to hear from another woman that her husband is really great in bed either or be with a guy that has had tons of women all over them.

Re: Can You Handle Dating a Mama’s Boy?

Gigi — Thu, 01 Sep 2011 15:50:26 -0000

Your story sounds like one of my stories with my boyfriend. YIKES!! It is to the point that I'm ready to end it. His mom is a nice lady but driving me absolutely crazy....I'll never be the #1 woman in my boyfriend's life. I love him dearly and he treats me good but my tongue is bleeding too badly from biting my tongue all the time. She tried inviting herself along on our first vacation together....thank god he said NO WAY! But, he had to spend the entire week with her before we left and had to be with her the night before because she was crying he was going on vacation. Good heavens! What would it be like if we got married and left on our honeymoon. It's hard to break up with a guy after you've invested a few years with him, but she needs to get a life (her husband is deceased) and my boyfriend needs to get some balls!

Re: Skinny Jeans and Earrings on Men???

Man Earring — Wed, 31 Aug 2011 02:51:34 -0000

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Re: Can You Handle Dating a Mama’s Boy?

EK — Wed, 17 Aug 2011 23:02:04 -0000

I think I can relate. We are both Chinese and we are both close to our families so I really appreciated that similarity. However, in the past year, we went on holidays with his parents to where his mother had wanted to go because he begged me to go/ wanted me there and I had time off when they did. We had a great time, and I thought his parents were pretty cool and it was a good chance to get to know them better. However, I crave for alone time! He had professional exams, I arranged vacation time to be right after the exams so we could go somewhere together or just have a staycation at home, but his mother wanted to travel to Europe so off they went. This time I thought what the hell, I'd take my parents on a holiday. Came summer and I had time off, and kept suggesting doing this and that. He said he was not sure he had enough vacation time left. Next thing I know, he was off with his folks again for a week long holiday on the west coast. I mentioned it to him, said I felt neglected and he said he will sort it out... I was led to believe Christmas will be the time for us alone together... he just told me that he wants to take his parents to China and life is not about jumping on a plane together. Well, if it's not about spending leisure time togeter, then what is it all about??
I feel neglected; #2; plan B; he spends time with me to do things that he can't do with his folks. Am I being too needy? That I want a life partner, a significant other with whom to travel, to eat, to explore, to relax? Or is he a classic mama's boy - either I accept the situation or run?

Re: Skinny Jeans and Earrings on Men???

Alexandertveraa — Thu, 11 Aug 2011 22:26:27 -0000

haha, you growin' old oldboy... Shit's poppin like this, tight jeans equals= sex appeal,self confidience and so fourt.....basicly skinny jeans be fucking pipmp
rl :)

Re: Can You Handle Dating a Mama’s Boy?

Melissa — Tue, 09 Aug 2011 23:11:08 -0000

I've been dating a mamma's boy for 3 1/2 years now. We both still live at home with our parents. My boyfriends mom & dad have been divorces since he was 3 and he doesn't have a good relationship with his dad at all. I read many of the responses and man there are some psycho mothers out there! I think my boyfriends mom is a little more passive (less insane lol). My boyfriend is turning 24 in December she his mom cooks multiple meals for him a day, does his laundry (sheets included embarrassing!) AND puts it away too, cleans his room (which can be VERY embarrassing if I left some fancy lingerie or toys around), cleans the entire house (well, some areas just aren't clean so maybe I gave her too much credit), and yes people.. she still packs his lunch. Wow.

I'm turning 25 in October and I feel like I'm getting to the point where I want to begin settling down i my life. I'm done with the whole party scene I never really enjoyed staying out all night drinking. But... how can I ever move on with my life when I have such a motherly-dependent bf.

I once casually mentioned to his mother, "Well, I think he should do his own laundry!" she simple looked at me and shrugged. She never gets insane like some of these other moms I've been reading about but I still really dislike how she is not encouraging her son to grow up. It is a mother's DUTY to encourage her son/daughers to grow up and become independent so they can eventually move out & have a happy family.

When I confront my boyfriend about being a mammas boy he normally ignores it and his excuse for not doing his own laundry is: "We all have teamwork in this family, I pity you for never being able to experience teamwork.... mom does laundry, cooking, etc and I do other chores"

What chores?

I found out he occasionally puts the dishes away and mows the lawn some of the time.

That is NOT teamwork. That is NOT what I want to end up having to be if I were to ever marry this man. I refuse to replace his mother. What if his mother were to suddenly die, I don't think this man would be able to care for himself. How sad! I've been doing my own laundry since I was 14 along with other chores I take TURNS with my parents when it comes to cooking dinner and putting it away. THAT is teamwork. I realize my dad is getting old and his arthritis hurts him so I've taken over a couple of his usual chores. I get so mad when my boyfriend calls his deal "teamwork" BULL SHIT.

I even just now remember this one time about a year and a half ago I said it would have been fun if he could have stayed at my place for a couple weeks while I had my own apartment @ school. He said... he couldn't because it wouldn't be safe for his mom to be alone. WTF... they live in AMISH country and they don't even lock their doors. BS.

I've mentioned many many times to my boyfriend how I am not happy with how he just lets his mom do everything for him... at first I started off subtle just hinting but for the last couple years I've been very blunt with what I have to say. Other than being a mammas boy he is a great guy and maybe I just haven't broken up with him yet... hoping he will one day change if not slowly. So far no luck and I fear our relationship is nearing an end.

Re: Can You Handle Dating a Mama’s Boy?

Melissa — Tue, 09 Aug 2011 22:53:37 -0000

You totally did the right thing, teach that mother! You go girl!!!

Re: Can You Handle Dating a Mama’s Boy?

Grace1871 — Thu, 04 Aug 2011 04:46:40 -0000

Oh yea...did I forget to mention that we changed our Romantic-Summer-Vacation to Putero Rico to Atlantic Beach, NJ, on a road-trip, with his parents? And, the moment we got to the hotel room, he called his folks to come join us there? Yup...I am serous.

Re: Can You Handle Dating a Mama’s Boy?

Grace1871 — Thu, 04 Aug 2011 04:39:16 -0000

My current boyfriend now is a mama's boy...it drives me mad. I know some of it may have to do with his culture, he is Chinese, but I do not get why every decision has to have her final say, why he picks her decision over mine, and when we have plans (as you pointed-out) he changes them if his mom wants to do something or needs his help with something. I feel that maybe a few times is acceptable, but not all them time like he seems to be doing lately. I am not really sure how to handle this either...when I bring it up, he "guilt-trips" me and says that "he is having to make both sides happy and that I need to understand the situation he is in"...I just do not understand...how can he appease both sides if he always chooses what his mother wants? I just spent a month's break at his folks house with him, and by the way, they do not speak any English so most of the decisions while here I am left out of, and I am about to go nutty. We have been together more than three years and I tell him he needs to involve me, help me with the language barrier, and so on...but, he tries (he really does) but just not good enough.

Any advice...please.

Re: Its hard to find a GOOD man!

Jade — Sun, 03 Jul 2011 03:34:30 -0000

I have a question..how are we supposed to see and know about the good they do when we're not around..if we're not around??

Re: Can You Handle Dating a Mama’s Boy?

shineontrue — Fri, 01 Jul 2011 19:40:07 -0000

This happens in catholic families, no? I married my mama's boy, and luckily i love his mama too. She is worth all of the love and devotion. she raised a family of five strong willed gorgeous kids essentially alone through tons of highs and lows.

I can only hope i will be as amazing of a mama cat one day.

Good luck ladies!!

Re: The Ugly Truth —— Men are Shallow!!

Shallownot — Fri, 01 Jul 2011 04:56:00 -0000

I love you, what's your email?

Re: The Ugly Truth —— Men are Shallow!!

Shallownot — Fri, 01 Jul 2011 04:55:17 -0000

this must have been written by a shallow guy. Nuff said.

Re: Men, Are You Chivalrous or Just Whipped?

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Re: The Ugly Truth —— Men are Shallow!!

Laura — Wed, 29 Jun 2011 03:20:57 -0000

Men will woo women to make them feel good, but basically all they are after is sex, even early in the relationship.

Re: Can You Handle Dating a Mama’s Boy?

Pookabear95 — Sun, 29 May 2011 09:55:47 -0000

i'm dating a momma's boy and it's a rollercoaster. Sometimes all you can do is grin and bare it (to a point) and hope he grows a pair to stand up to her, unless it's an extreme case